So we now have a show scheduled: February 15th in Valley Stream. For me performance always leads to mixed emotions, and a lot of them. There’s the anticipation of the opportunity to play some great music, and the dread of schlepping my gear (four amps and three or four instruments, as well as a mic stand and a gym bag full of effects), and the joy of sharing this music with an audience, as well as the fear that the venue will be close to empty, and add in worries about the sound (we haven’t played here yet) and if I’ll be able to play at the standard I try to hold myself to, as well as the hope that some new people may get exposed to our music at this show and maybe become fans. All together it’s enough to drive someone bipolar.
So I just try to put it out of my mind (which doesn’t work) and when these thoughts and emotions do come up, not make them important (that does work). If I’m scared, I let myself be scared and go on w/ whatever I’m doing. If I’m happy I let myself be happy and don’t dilute it w/ the worries and contradictins that will invariably come up if I make a big deal out of being happy. (how’s that for irony?) This seems to work for me (somewhat). I’d love to find out if someone has a better idea.